


honey you're familiar (like my mirror)

by quinziggle



Category: DCU, Harley Quinn (Comics)
Genre: Cat stuck up a tree AU, F/F, Firefighter Clark Kent, Firefighter Harley Quinn, Fluff, this is so self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:41:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26462818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quinziggle/pseuds/quinziggle
Summary: Ivy catsits for Selina, loses one of the cats up a tree and Harley is the firefighter that comes to the rescue.
Relationships: Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel, Poison Ivy/Harley Quinn
Comments: 6
Kudos: 59





	honey you're familiar (like my mirror)

When Selina had asked her to look after her cats for the weekend, Ivy had readily agreed. After all, any idiot could have and look after a pet, and she had two PhDs, so she'd reckoned the whole thing would be easy, a nice break from her own apartment and an opportunity to spend some time alone relaxing.   
On the Friday night, Selina leaves her with the keys to her apartment and the printed menu for the local Thai place, as well as clear instructions on how to look after the three cats. So far, so good.   
Once Selina leaves, Ivy orders a vegetable curry with fried rice and makes herself at home, settling in onto Selina's couch and resting her feet on the table, flexing her toes within her cactus print socks. Two of the cats wind their way purring under her calves, their furry backs tickling her gently. The third leaps into her lap and circles gently before sitting down. Reaching down, she begins to pet it carefully and the cat soon starts to purr, arching up into her hand. Presently, her food arrives and she scoops up the cat so she can stand to answer the door. Once she's finished, she opens her laptop and logs on to finish some work while the cats play on the floor, idly batting at each other. Soon, she looks up at the time, yawning, and logs off. Ivy opens her bag and takes out her night things and goes to change in the bathroom. She brushes her teeth, washes her face and puts her hair into one large braid, the curls spilling out haphazardly. Then, she heads back out into Selina's living room and changes the cats' water and feeds them, stroking each one gently. "Goodnight," she says, stretching. The cats blink up at her before going back to their bowls. She shrugs and walks to Selina's guest room, and gets into bed.   
  
It's in the morning that the trouble begins. She showers and dresses, feeds the cats, makes herself a coffee with the gleaming silver machine (it takes a few tries to figure out how to use it) and eats toast while looking pensively out of the window. "Right, cats," She says, feeling a little silly for talking to the animals. "We're going for a walk."   
There are three shiny leads that attach to the cats' collars and she struggles for a minute to clip them in before finally, finally managing. "Okay," She says, getting to her feet. The cats look up at her, deeply unimpressed, and she sighs. "Let's go."   
  
At first, going to the park is a great idea. The cats behave themselves beautifully, and apart from the occasional strange look she gets for walking cats, everything is fine. Then, she looks down and the black cat she's been calling Beans (Selina had told her the cats names, of course, but they'd been pretentious and she'd forgotten them almost immediately) has vanished. "Shit," She says quietly, and then louder, "Shit!" A passing mother with a small child gives her a dirty look.   
The other two cats, Cookie and Peanut, stare up at her balefully. She pulls them with her, as she looks for Beans by the trash can, by the fountain, by the swing set, growing more and more frantic. "Selina's going to kill me," She mutters, trying to stay calm. "Oh, I'm going to be disemboweled by your mommy," She tells the cats.   
  
Then finally, finally, she hears a plaintive mew from somewhere above. It's Beans, perched high above in the branches of a tall tree. _Seriously?_ She thinks. "Seriously, Beans?" She says aloud, for good measure. _Okay,_ she thinks. _How am I going to get h_ _im_ _down?_

Logically, she knows there's no way she's going to be able to get there. Practically, she knows she has to try. She ties the end of the cats leads to the bench beneath the tree and looks up, hands on hips, surveying the tree. She's glad she didn't wear a skirt. "Okay," she says. "I can do this." She lifts her leg up experimentally and rests her foot on a small knot in the tree, leaning her weight on it. She gets her other leg around the tree and wraps her arms around the trunk, pushing herself up. She manages a few more inches before falling and landing heavily on her behind. "Shit," She says, with feeling. Ivy unties the other two cats from the bench and holds the lead tightly, as if that will make up for the cat staring smugly down at her. She sits on the bench and waits. "I'm not bothering the fire department with this," She mutters.   
  
She waits an hour before dialling 911.

The operator is very patient, and doesn't even laugh. Within about half an hour, a bright blur of red catches her eye and she spots the fire truck parking against the park railings. She waves to them, feeling her face flush with embarrassment as the two firefighters get out and walk towards her. "Hi," She says, face hot with shame. "Sorry, it's my friend's cat. I'm looking after them all, and he got up there somehow, he's stuck."   
"Not to worry," The male firefighter says, smiling broadly with dimples. "That's what we're here for, ma'am."   
"I really didn't want to bother you," Ivy explains. "I'm sorry to have disturbed you guys from your actual work."   
"Nah," The female firefighter says, squatting down to pet Cookie and Peanut. "It's good ta have a break, an' rescuing kitties is so fun!" She looks up at Ivy and winks mischievously.

Ivy swallows nervously. Her eyes are very blue.   
Then she gets to her feet and puts her hands on her hips, all business. "Okay, Clark honey, I'm gonna need ya to bring the truck a bit closer to this tree and then we'll have a go with the ladder," She turns back to Ivy, grinning widely as the other firefighter sets off towards the fire truck. "We'll have the little critter down in no time, 'kay ma'am?"   
"Um, yeah," Ivy says, trying not to stare at the cute little gap between her front teeth. "It's Ivy, by the way. I don't like to be called ma'am."   
"Pretty name for a pretty girl!" The firefighter says cheerfully. "I'm Harley. What are these babies called?" Ivy tries to remember the names Selina had told her. "Uh, I think Nyx and Iris? Or Nox and Isis? My friend named them. I just call them Peanut and Cookie. That little loose cannon is Beans." She says, pointing up to the tree where Beans is curled up stubbornly. "Cute names!" Harley says. "I got dogs, Bud and Lou." And then, as the other firefighter gets out of the fire truck, "Ah, I'd better get back on with this. Gotta get Beans back to ya somehow!" Her bi-coloured pigtails bounce as she walks over to the ladder and Ivy watches, transfixed. Harley climbs the ladder quickly and is soon at the top with her arms outstretched to Beans, who after a while, reluctantly enters her hands and is lifted down to safety. When Beans is placed back into her hands, Ivy attaches his collar back to the lead and double-checks it carefully before turning back to Harley. "Thank you so much," She says. "I'd be dead meat without you, Selina loves her cats more than she loves me."   
Harley's face twitches with something for a second. "Is that ya girlfriend?" She asks, considerably less chirpily.   
"No, no way," Ivy says. "I'm in the market for one though." And then internally winces. _Why did she say that?!_ _  
_"Oh!" Harley says, brightening. "Me too. I'm not technically s'posed to do this, but can I give ya my number?"  
"Yeah! Yes, please." Ivy replies, bashfully holding out her phone for Harley to type her number in. "I'd love that."   
"Let's go out for coffee tomorrow? I'm off then," Harley says.   
Ivy hesitates. "Can I bring these little guys?"   
"Obviously," Harley says, looking delighted at the prospect of spending more time with Beans. "Can I bring my pups?"   
"Obviously!" Ivy says.   
"Quinn, let's go," the other firefighter calls from the truck. "We've got a call out."   
"Okay, okay," Harley yells back. "Bye, Ivy," She says, winking. "Text me."   
Ivy watches the fire truck drive away until it goes over the bridge into Metropolis and vanishes from sight. Then she gets down and kisses Beans firmly on the head. "Good boy," She says, "Very very good boy.”


End file.
